I Shoulda Been a Detective

About a week ago I wrote a blog that I hoped would clear up some misunderstandings about me posing as a judge. My name is Ed Truitt and at 58 years old I don't have any inclination to change it. It seems there's an Ed Emmett in Texas who's about my age and I doubt he wants to change his name since it's so similar to my famous moniker. Us two Eds would probably never have heard of one another if my wife's nephew hadn't used his picture on one of my social media sites that I didn't want in the first place. You might say in trying to keep him entertained no good deed went unpunished.

I thought I would use humor to let my former "neighbor" in Greenhill know that her attempts to get me in some serious hot water over a misunderstanding were not very much appreciated. It seems she doesn't use her real picture in her MySpace site, but one of a much thinner and prettier woman. The site just lists first names, so I did a screen shot of the whole page that included her son with snaps of his new son in a hospital maternity ward.

Yep, I thought I might really make her mad, but at this point I didn't care. I own a small business that relies on customers believing in my honesty, and she doesn't even have a job. Unless being a busy body counts. I was prepared to get some angry emails that would criticize me for making fun of a fat ugly woman, but instead I got several emails that thanked me. Why?

It seems that Debra's son is Joshua Darren McClain. Josh isn't with the mother of his son anymore and has taken up car burglary as a hobby. From my email I gather he has quite a record of thefts from last year and hasn't bothered to show up in court half the time. This is his mug shot, totally unphotoshopped. (Does he have a black eye?)

If you know Joshua's current location, the Lauderdale County Sheriff's Office is looking for him. Call them at 256-766-5757 and ask for Jr Witt. Tell them Ed sent you.

The Judge & Me...and Debra Makes Three

Hi folks. I'm not a judge and I don't even play one on television. But I do have an interesting tale about a Texas judge and me. The wife and I were taking care of her 13 year old nephew for a week and it was no easy task. When he asked if he could set me up with a MySpace and Facebook account, I said sure. What kind of trouble could he get me into? Age? Let's say 29. Income? Oh, roughly a half million. It's not like anyone is going to take it seriously, now is it?

Picture? Oh, just pick one out. Now to most people that would mean picking one out from the snaps stored on the hard drive, but not to the nephew. When I looked at the finished product the man staring back at me was someone I'd never seen before. How did the little guy pick him? I've never asked, but the judge, as I've come to call him, and I have very similar names, so maybe he Googled me and came up with the guy from Texas. I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say I doubt the judge really cares if anyone used his picture as long as no one used his name, rank, or serial number. I didn't even know who he was until my dear, kind neighbor from Greenhill told me. And quite a few other people, bless her heart.

So why did I keep it? Hey the guy was better looking than me. A lot of people, especially women, substitute pictures of those that put their looks in the shade. Take my neighbor from Greenhill that I just mentioned. Would you want to be a 300 pound washed out 60ish blond when you could look like this?

Until next time, this is Ed saying blogging is cheaper than a lawyer and a whole lot more fun.